adventure. love. craziness.

Since it's nearing the end of the year, it is time for a little wrap-up of 2011. Last year I documented the wrap-up here and here. Maybe I'll get around to filling out the same questionnaire, but for now I just thought I'd bear a little of my soul :) Been waiting for awhile to do this ... are you ready? Or, I guess — am I?

I made a resolution this year (and this is an exact quote): "In 2011, I resolve to fall in love." See, I've loved boys. I've loved boys who are my best friends. But I'd never yet been "in love." Well, this year, it happened. And fast. It wasn't something I really planned for, even though I wrote that resolution. I normally have a plethora of crushes ... I've always been a little boy crazy. It is insane to think back on 2011 and think of less than a handful of boys that have given me butterflies. 

So, the boy I loved ... it is crazy to say that too. You read about him, saw a few pictures, and then he was gone. People always told me how happy I seemed with him. I never wrote about the breakup because I didn't know how. It was my first real heartbreak and boy did it hurt! I cried. And cried. And cried. For days and even months (not daily at that point, thankfully). We had talked about getting married. I imagined being a part of his life forever. I loved his family — and they loved me too. Going to his home felt like going home for me. I had never felt so comfortable in a place before. Honestly, my relationship with his dad was better than my relationship with my own dad. 

Sometimes I still am sad thinking about it, even though it has been three months. It does get easier as time passes. Slowly but surely. 

The lucky thing is that I've had such wonderful friends & family there for me through all of it. I didn't know how weak I was until I had my heart broken. Then I saw just how vulnerable I could be. 

So, that's a big thing that happened in 2011. But, the scariest thing was thinking, after it happened, that I would never fall in love again. Now I know that's silly thinking & I just have to believe I will. I will be a lucky girl someday when I have a guy man who loves, appreciates, and wants to be with me everyday,  forever. 

Right? Here's to more adventures in 2012.